Elvis Envy

At a recent Press briefing, Tony Snow was asked why he thought, North Korea chose July 4th, at the very same moment NASA launched space shuttle Discovery, to launch seven missiles of its own, into the Sea of Japan? Did (he) think that with all the recent attention paid to Iran’s efforts to develop nuclear weapons, the North Koreans wanted the world’s spotlight to again shine their way? With President Bush, fresh off his visit to Graceland with Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi, Snow responded that the coincidence of launching on our Independence Day might have been intentional but he believed that there was no connection to the Shuttle lift off.
North Korea’s Dictator; Kim Jong Il; well-known for his giant glasses, playboy lifestyle and big, bouffant hair believes himself to be ‘the God-King’ and God’s gift to women everywhere. In effect - Elvis incarnate. Imagine Kim’s dismay when his nemesis from across the sea, Koizumi, was seen around the world, playing his air-guitar with Pricilla and Lisa Marie Presley, live in Memphis.
Personally, I believe that a severe case of ‘Elvis-envy’ pushed the little pot-bellied, dog-eating dictator to launch against Japan and Hawaii (site of numerous Elvis movies).
In the aftermath of this diplomatic faux pas, there are only three possible solutions; UN sanctions, Military action or President Bush could extend a similar invitation to Kim Jong Il to be his guest at Graceland as well. And just to make sure Kim doesn’t get to feeling like ‘sloppy-seconds’, the prez should take him to Disney World as well. After (he) gets a look at the night time spectacular pyrotechnics, narrated by Jiminy Cricket and the Blue Fairy, Kim will realize his nukes and rockets are no match and will beg for peace and a little rendezvous with the Blue Fairy at Cinderella’s Castle.